I'm A Mama Bear!
I am a woman, I have enjoyed being a woman, most of the time. I have been a granddaughter, daughter, niece, sister, wife, mother, grandma and friend. Each genre has been a wonderful experience, but without a shadow of a doubt, the most fulfilling has been a mother/grandma.
From the moment I knew I was carrying a child inside me, or knew my daughter was, I was already in love with this unknown tiny being wreaking havoc on my body, and my daughter's body. Even through horrendous pregnancies, labour and birth, I still kept my eye on my prize. I love my children and grandchildren with a fierceness I cannot describe. I don't know if there is even a word in the English dictionary that defines such a feeling.
I know I am not alone. Most parents feel the same about their offspring. It's what keeps our species alive. So, when someone is cruel to one of my children, or has hurt one, I become a big, ugly grizzly bear mama. I attack first, ask questions later...if at all.
This past weekend, someone attacked my son's character. It happens, everyone isn't going to like or respect you. However, when it's part of your extended family, it hurts. When I called this person on being a jerk, he accused me of coddling my son and sticking my nose where it doesn't belong, because I defended my son. My son is my son, and yes, sometimes he too can be an ass. When he is, then he has to take his lumps, but when he isn't, and he has put himself out to help someone, and then that person choses someone else's help, without saying anything, leaving my son scratching his head, and then has the audacity to verbally bash him, then I have to jump in. My son, wasn't even present to hear this, but I was, hence the claws.
This person, is someone my son has looked up to since he was a child. And, if the same thing happened tomorrow, my son would probably still offer to help, because he loves him. This guy, I'm sure wouldn't care and do the same thing. Why? Who knows.
I do know, that this person has never had children, but he has had dog's. His last dog, bit several people in her lifetime. I never said anything to him, because this dog was like his child. I could never do that, intentionally hurt someone by making cruel remarks. This person, has always been very critical of my children. Over the years, it has really hurt me. Especially when it wasn't deserved. It was just cruel.
This from a guy whose mother paid his rent for years, and many other things. He was attatched to her until she died. This is why I don't understand how he can be so hurtful.
This whole thing, really upset me all weekend. I still can't get it out of my head. My son's best friend, did this "favour" for this person, knowing my son, his best friend was going to do it. He threw my son under the proverbial bus. Again, I don't know why. I don't know if there is a hidden agenda, or if they're both just as*holes. I'm thinking the latter.
For me, I'm still circling, like a mama bear, waiting watching. Because, when someone hurts my child, especially intentionally, they hurt me-with the most intense pain ever! I have a very difficult time recovering.
Family to me is caring, and loving and protecting each other. Not setting someone up just to see them fall and then mocking them when they do. That's for the rest of the world. Family should be a safe place to land, a warm hug, a shoulder to cry on, and cheer you when you succeed. Families aren't perfect but they should work together.
Life goes on, some life lessons are difficult to learn, some are painful. My son has forgiven both of them, as have I. Forgotten... no, not yet.
From the moment I knew I was carrying a child inside me, or knew my daughter was, I was already in love with this unknown tiny being wreaking havoc on my body, and my daughter's body. Even through horrendous pregnancies, labour and birth, I still kept my eye on my prize. I love my children and grandchildren with a fierceness I cannot describe. I don't know if there is even a word in the English dictionary that defines such a feeling.
I know I am not alone. Most parents feel the same about their offspring. It's what keeps our species alive. So, when someone is cruel to one of my children, or has hurt one, I become a big, ugly grizzly bear mama. I attack first, ask questions later...if at all.
This past weekend, someone attacked my son's character. It happens, everyone isn't going to like or respect you. However, when it's part of your extended family, it hurts. When I called this person on being a jerk, he accused me of coddling my son and sticking my nose where it doesn't belong, because I defended my son. My son is my son, and yes, sometimes he too can be an ass. When he is, then he has to take his lumps, but when he isn't, and he has put himself out to help someone, and then that person choses someone else's help, without saying anything, leaving my son scratching his head, and then has the audacity to verbally bash him, then I have to jump in. My son, wasn't even present to hear this, but I was, hence the claws.
This person, is someone my son has looked up to since he was a child. And, if the same thing happened tomorrow, my son would probably still offer to help, because he loves him. This guy, I'm sure wouldn't care and do the same thing. Why? Who knows.
I do know, that this person has never had children, but he has had dog's. His last dog, bit several people in her lifetime. I never said anything to him, because this dog was like his child. I could never do that, intentionally hurt someone by making cruel remarks. This person, has always been very critical of my children. Over the years, it has really hurt me. Especially when it wasn't deserved. It was just cruel.
This from a guy whose mother paid his rent for years, and many other things. He was attatched to her until she died. This is why I don't understand how he can be so hurtful.
This whole thing, really upset me all weekend. I still can't get it out of my head. My son's best friend, did this "favour" for this person, knowing my son, his best friend was going to do it. He threw my son under the proverbial bus. Again, I don't know why. I don't know if there is a hidden agenda, or if they're both just as*holes. I'm thinking the latter.
For me, I'm still circling, like a mama bear, waiting watching. Because, when someone hurts my child, especially intentionally, they hurt me-with the most intense pain ever! I have a very difficult time recovering.
Family to me is caring, and loving and protecting each other. Not setting someone up just to see them fall and then mocking them when they do. That's for the rest of the world. Family should be a safe place to land, a warm hug, a shoulder to cry on, and cheer you when you succeed. Families aren't perfect but they should work together.
Life goes on, some life lessons are difficult to learn, some are painful. My son has forgiven both of them, as have I. Forgotten... no, not yet.
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