A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Kitchen
My little cat, Bella, loves water bottle lids. She plays with them, much like Wayne Gretzky on a breakaway. Nobody can catch her, she is very coordinated, and she is accurate when it comes to handling them. Twice a year, when it's time to pull out my sectional and scrub the baseboards, and the floor underneath it, I always find about 20 water bottle lids lodged behind it, only because Bella can't retrieve them! When I pull it out, she is right there with me, anxious to see her long lost toys. I sweep all of the caps into the middle of the living room floor, and Bella picks each one up and hides them like a squirrel.
I usually hear my tiny ball of energy playing with them in the night when everyone is sleeping. Many times I have rolled over on one or more of these wretched little caps! I have learned through past experiences, it is best NOT to throw them off of the bed! In doing this, I become obligated to play, its a non verbal contract with my cat. Believe me when I say, it's a binding agreement and hard to get out of!
I throw the cap (s), and she jumps down from my bed and quickly pounces on it, and then immediately brings it back to me and drops it on my face. Its not so amusing at 2:47 am! Suffice to say, my bedside table has a collection of plastic lids.
Now, the last time I pulled my sectional out for my spring cleaning, was the beginning of June. I warn everyone who visits my home, make SURE the lid to any water or pop bottle is screwed onto the bottle tight, and, don't put it on the table unattended because Bella is always watching, she is like the Stealth Bomber, she comes in fast and undetected. Back to my spring cleaning, I did not knowingly have any caps laying around, but Bella, obviously had a stash.
It was 7:05 am, this morning. My bladder informed me it was time to wake up. After my morning yawn and stretch, I walked around my bed, and out into the hall. I was awake, physically anyway. My mind doesn't usually wake up until I wash my face and drink my first cup of coffee.
So, today was no different. I performed my morning duties on auto pilot, emptied my bladder, washed my face, and brushed some toothpaste across my teeth. I was beginning to wake up, " coffee, must get coffee". The kitchen is about 4 steps from my bathroom, 4 small steps, a straight, unencumbered path, to zen, to coffee!
It all happened so fast, I was on my final step, and then I was skating. Yes, skating! My eyes immediately snapped open, my arms began flailing and I could hear the beginning of a wail coming from my wide open mouth. I was sliding across my kitchen floor on a plastic bottle cap, with nothing to stop me but my table and it was quickly approaching! Wham! It arrived, or rather I did.
I have seen figure skaters on television as well as in person. They are beautiful, graceful ballerinas on ice. They make twirling and gliding across the ice look so...effortless. I am NOT a figure skater. In fact, I learned to skate in hand me down hockey skates. (3 brothers, remember? ) I could never twirl, or whirl, I could only skate, forwards, nothing fancy or graceful. I haven't had a pair of skates on my feet since my children were young. It was a terrible, frightening experience. My son pushed me into the middle of the rink, I had nothing to hold onto. Kids were whizzing past me, I was trying to get one of them to slow down long enough to hold me up. No deal, they must have seen the look of panic on my face, because they skated around me laughing. Little vermin! Wait til we get in the parking lot, let's see how fast you can run with a crazy lady chasing you in a van! Eventually, I made it to the other side of the rink, memorized the little heathens faces that tried to push me on the ice for later, and hobbled to the bench and took my boots of torture off my feet. I vowed to myself, NEVER AGAIN WOULD I SKATE!
Bella, was not aware of my vow! I was prostate, across my table, trying to catch my breath. Maybe I could yell loud enough for my husband to get the pry bar from the garage.
Slowly, I pulled myself up, my foot was still standing on the bottle cap. I tore it off of my foot and threw it out of frustration. Bella, hearing the unmistakable sound of a plastic bottle cap hitting the floor, came running. She picked up the cap, and dropped it at my feet. She sat there looking at me, expectantly and cute as ever.
I made my coffee, hobbled to the living room, sat down, and rubbed my foot. I reflected on my morning events and the unexpected ride on my way to get coffee. My granddaughter came out of her room and said "Grandma, what was that noise"? I looked at Bella, and rubbed the top of her head. Laughing, I said "Nothing honey, but, a funny thing happened on the way to the kitchen!
♡♡ Bella ♡♡
I usually hear my tiny ball of energy playing with them in the night when everyone is sleeping. Many times I have rolled over on one or more of these wretched little caps! I have learned through past experiences, it is best NOT to throw them off of the bed! In doing this, I become obligated to play, its a non verbal contract with my cat. Believe me when I say, it's a binding agreement and hard to get out of!
I throw the cap (s), and she jumps down from my bed and quickly pounces on it, and then immediately brings it back to me and drops it on my face. Its not so amusing at 2:47 am! Suffice to say, my bedside table has a collection of plastic lids.
Now, the last time I pulled my sectional out for my spring cleaning, was the beginning of June. I warn everyone who visits my home, make SURE the lid to any water or pop bottle is screwed onto the bottle tight, and, don't put it on the table unattended because Bella is always watching, she is like the Stealth Bomber, she comes in fast and undetected. Back to my spring cleaning, I did not knowingly have any caps laying around, but Bella, obviously had a stash.
It was 7:05 am, this morning. My bladder informed me it was time to wake up. After my morning yawn and stretch, I walked around my bed, and out into the hall. I was awake, physically anyway. My mind doesn't usually wake up until I wash my face and drink my first cup of coffee.
So, today was no different. I performed my morning duties on auto pilot, emptied my bladder, washed my face, and brushed some toothpaste across my teeth. I was beginning to wake up, " coffee, must get coffee". The kitchen is about 4 steps from my bathroom, 4 small steps, a straight, unencumbered path, to zen, to coffee!
It all happened so fast, I was on my final step, and then I was skating. Yes, skating! My eyes immediately snapped open, my arms began flailing and I could hear the beginning of a wail coming from my wide open mouth. I was sliding across my kitchen floor on a plastic bottle cap, with nothing to stop me but my table and it was quickly approaching! Wham! It arrived, or rather I did.
I have seen figure skaters on television as well as in person. They are beautiful, graceful ballerinas on ice. They make twirling and gliding across the ice look so...effortless. I am NOT a figure skater. In fact, I learned to skate in hand me down hockey skates. (3 brothers, remember? ) I could never twirl, or whirl, I could only skate, forwards, nothing fancy or graceful. I haven't had a pair of skates on my feet since my children were young. It was a terrible, frightening experience. My son pushed me into the middle of the rink, I had nothing to hold onto. Kids were whizzing past me, I was trying to get one of them to slow down long enough to hold me up. No deal, they must have seen the look of panic on my face, because they skated around me laughing. Little vermin! Wait til we get in the parking lot, let's see how fast you can run with a crazy lady chasing you in a van! Eventually, I made it to the other side of the rink, memorized the little heathens faces that tried to push me on the ice for later, and hobbled to the bench and took my boots of torture off my feet. I vowed to myself, NEVER AGAIN WOULD I SKATE!
Bella, was not aware of my vow! I was prostate, across my table, trying to catch my breath. Maybe I could yell loud enough for my husband to get the pry bar from the garage.
Slowly, I pulled myself up, my foot was still standing on the bottle cap. I tore it off of my foot and threw it out of frustration. Bella, hearing the unmistakable sound of a plastic bottle cap hitting the floor, came running. She picked up the cap, and dropped it at my feet. She sat there looking at me, expectantly and cute as ever.
I made my coffee, hobbled to the living room, sat down, and rubbed my foot. I reflected on my morning events and the unexpected ride on my way to get coffee. My granddaughter came out of her room and said "Grandma, what was that noise"? I looked at Bella, and rubbed the top of her head. Laughing, I said "Nothing honey, but, a funny thing happened on the way to the kitchen!
♡♡ Bella ♡♡
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