Whatever Doesn't Kill You, Makes You Stranger
I had a job interview yesterday. I am looking to get a part time job in the afternoons, for something to do while my husband is at work. Over the past couple of weeks, I have applied to a dozen jobs.
I was pleased when I received a phone call for an interview last week. "Yahoo!" I said to myself. My interview, was early last night.
After taking my husband his dinner, I drove to the building where I was to have my interview. As I walked up to it, everything looked dark. "Hmmm." I thought, I hope I didn't get this information wrong, but as I approached the front door and pulled, it was unlocked. "Okay." I was looking for suite 2032, I assumed it was on the second floor. I ran up the stairs, and opened the hall door, only to see Suites 3010-3040. Apparently, suite 2032 was on the first floor. I ran back down to the first floor, opened up the hall door and finally found the sign for suite 2032.
I opened the door, and was met by a woman typing on a keyboard. She stopped long enough to ask me who I was there to see. I smiled my biggest, brightest smile and said "Steve." She looked at me and asked "Which one? There are 2 Steve's in this office." My smile, disappeared. I immediately began thinking back to our telephone conversation, but I was so excited I couldn't recall his last name. Seeing the expression on my face, she asked me my name. She told me to sit down, and Steve would call me in shortly. I still was in the dark, as far as his last name.
I looked around and saw magazines on the small glass table beside me. They were car and truck magazines. I decided to just sit and wait. I sat, and sat, and sat, it was very warm in that reception area. I had decided to wear my navy blue silk blouse, dark gray flannel dress pants, and a cream, gray and navy cashmere sweater, with my silk scarf, tied nicely around my neck. My husband calls my sweater my Dances with Wolves shawl. It's really very nice, and I looked professional for this interview. I even wore makeup, foundation and full eye makeup. I was confident, at least in how I looked. I peaked at the clock, I had been sitting there for 15 minutes. I was hot, and I wanted to take off my scarf and my sweater, but it was all went together, so instead, I picked up one of those car magazines and began to frantically fan myself. Steve came out and called my name as I quickly threw the magazine back onto the pile.
He asked me if I was a classic car enthusiast. I looked at him, thinking to myself "Is this some kind of a trick question?" "Oh!" The light bulb went on in my head. "No, it was warm, I..." Too much information I said to myself, keep it simple. I said "No." I sat in his office, which is about the size of my bathroom, and listened to him ramble on about the job. I was hot, really hot, in fact, my makeup was melting off of my face, and I felt like I was going to spontaneously combust.
He told me to describe myself. The only words I could come up with were synonyms for hot. My mind was desperately trying to cooperate with Steve, but my body was yelling "Run, find a freezer, remove your clothes, save yourself!" I am a very literate woman, I have an excellent vocabulary, and I am usually fairly proficient in describing my attributes. However, last night, I can only plead, hotflash! My brain was being boiled, the only words I could verbalize when asked to describe myself were "Well, I get a little hot sometimes." Steve looked at me, trying to throw me a lifeline and said "And..." I began to laugh, as I yanked off my scarf, "Well, I may come across as insane sometimes, but I'm really not, I just get a little flustered." Steve looked at me, closing his folder and said "I see." Realizing what just happened, I tried to recover. I began rambling "I'm sorry, it's just that I'm so hot, not sexy hot, but warm hot. I'm having a hot flash. It will subside in a few minutes. I wore this scarf, and I shouldn't have, I knew it when I left the house today, but it goes with my outfit."
Steve was standing up, and opening the door. He was thanking me for speaking with him. Steve was holding his hand out in the direction of the hallway. Steve was smiling that pitiful smile that people give when they see something sad.
I walked out to the hallway and found the bathroom . I took one look in the mirror and I saw the most hideous reflection staring back. There I stood, with my makeup totally melted off of my face like a candle, my mascara had run down my cheeks, I looked like Heath Ledger, when he played the Joker in The Dark Knight. " Well, that clinches it then", I said out loud, "If Steve needs the Joker for anything, I've got the job." I washed my face, and threw cold water on my neck, opened the door to the bathroom and went to my car.
I don't know if I will be getting a job anytime soon, I'm not sure the work force is ready for me.
I was pleased when I received a phone call for an interview last week. "Yahoo!" I said to myself. My interview, was early last night.
After taking my husband his dinner, I drove to the building where I was to have my interview. As I walked up to it, everything looked dark. "Hmmm." I thought, I hope I didn't get this information wrong, but as I approached the front door and pulled, it was unlocked. "Okay." I was looking for suite 2032, I assumed it was on the second floor. I ran up the stairs, and opened the hall door, only to see Suites 3010-3040. Apparently, suite 2032 was on the first floor. I ran back down to the first floor, opened up the hall door and finally found the sign for suite 2032.
I opened the door, and was met by a woman typing on a keyboard. She stopped long enough to ask me who I was there to see. I smiled my biggest, brightest smile and said "Steve." She looked at me and asked "Which one? There are 2 Steve's in this office." My smile, disappeared. I immediately began thinking back to our telephone conversation, but I was so excited I couldn't recall his last name. Seeing the expression on my face, she asked me my name. She told me to sit down, and Steve would call me in shortly. I still was in the dark, as far as his last name.
I looked around and saw magazines on the small glass table beside me. They were car and truck magazines. I decided to just sit and wait. I sat, and sat, and sat, it was very warm in that reception area. I had decided to wear my navy blue silk blouse, dark gray flannel dress pants, and a cream, gray and navy cashmere sweater, with my silk scarf, tied nicely around my neck. My husband calls my sweater my Dances with Wolves shawl. It's really very nice, and I looked professional for this interview. I even wore makeup, foundation and full eye makeup. I was confident, at least in how I looked. I peaked at the clock, I had been sitting there for 15 minutes. I was hot, and I wanted to take off my scarf and my sweater, but it was all went together, so instead, I picked up one of those car magazines and began to frantically fan myself. Steve came out and called my name as I quickly threw the magazine back onto the pile.
He asked me if I was a classic car enthusiast. I looked at him, thinking to myself "Is this some kind of a trick question?" "Oh!" The light bulb went on in my head. "No, it was warm, I..." Too much information I said to myself, keep it simple. I said "No." I sat in his office, which is about the size of my bathroom, and listened to him ramble on about the job. I was hot, really hot, in fact, my makeup was melting off of my face, and I felt like I was going to spontaneously combust.
He told me to describe myself. The only words I could come up with were synonyms for hot. My mind was desperately trying to cooperate with Steve, but my body was yelling "Run, find a freezer, remove your clothes, save yourself!" I am a very literate woman, I have an excellent vocabulary, and I am usually fairly proficient in describing my attributes. However, last night, I can only plead, hotflash! My brain was being boiled, the only words I could verbalize when asked to describe myself were "Well, I get a little hot sometimes." Steve looked at me, trying to throw me a lifeline and said "And..." I began to laugh, as I yanked off my scarf, "Well, I may come across as insane sometimes, but I'm really not, I just get a little flustered." Steve looked at me, closing his folder and said "I see." Realizing what just happened, I tried to recover. I began rambling "I'm sorry, it's just that I'm so hot, not sexy hot, but warm hot. I'm having a hot flash. It will subside in a few minutes. I wore this scarf, and I shouldn't have, I knew it when I left the house today, but it goes with my outfit."
Steve was standing up, and opening the door. He was thanking me for speaking with him. Steve was holding his hand out in the direction of the hallway. Steve was smiling that pitiful smile that people give when they see something sad.
I walked out to the hallway and found the bathroom . I took one look in the mirror and I saw the most hideous reflection staring back. There I stood, with my makeup totally melted off of my face like a candle, my mascara had run down my cheeks, I looked like Heath Ledger, when he played the Joker in The Dark Knight. " Well, that clinches it then", I said out loud, "If Steve needs the Joker for anything, I've got the job." I washed my face, and threw cold water on my neck, opened the door to the bathroom and went to my car.
I don't know if I will be getting a job anytime soon, I'm not sure the work force is ready for me.
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