52 Candles
Today is my birthday, and I am 52. I don't feel 52, or at least I don't feel the way I think a 52 year old should feel!
That being said, I do have my days when I feel as if I am carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders. Usually, though, I feel confident in who I am and my place in this world.
I have simple dreams, nothing extraordinary, to other peoples standards, and that is OK to me, I'm not trying to live anyone else's idea of what life should be. I have never had worldly aspirations of fame or fortune, or ever had a true case of wanderlust.
My dreams were to find a good man that I love with all of my heart, a man who loves me back the same way, and thankfully, I have been very blessed with just that kind of man! I knew I wanted children, and Voila, I have a son and a daughter, as well as 2 beautiful grandchildren, the loves of my life! My health is on track, even after a few bumps in the road of life, but, I am back from my detour, traveling down a straightforward highway.
My grandmother always used to say "On your birthday, reflect on your past year. What would you change, if you could, what made you the happiest? What do you want to accomplish between today and your next birthday? What are you willing to sacrifice to achieve it"? Pretty profound questions, if you really think about it. As a child, I was always flippant with my answers, as a young adult, I was unrealistic in my answers.
Today, I have thought a lot about my choices this past year. What would I change? I'm not sure I would have changed anything, what has made me the happiest? Without a doubt, my grandchildren! They bring out the big kid in me and keep me laughing and feeling young. Exhausted? Obviously, but happy! My friends as well, laughing, and getting together playing a rousing game of Wizard, with Shelley and her husband Kerry, and once this year, I actually beat Kerry, which was a definite highlight! Talking and laughing with Char for hours, until our bellies hurt. Playing Euchre and Chrocinole with Rick and Deb, positive that the men cheated! So many fun times this past year. The times, I am truly thankful for.
What do I want to accomplish this next year? I don't know, I need some time to consider it. I would like to say end hunger in my community, but I know that won't happen in 1 year, and it would require more than me to accomplish it. If I could, I would sacrifice my me time, which isn't much, so when I get it, I appreciate it. However, I would gladly give it up to erase the pain and stigma of hunger.
So, today, I have reflected on my past years experiences, good and bad, planned for my next year, and prayed for its fruition.
Now, I am left with 364 days, and 17 hours until my next birthday, so I am free to hear my family sing me Happy Birthday, make a wish, eat a piece, or maybe even 2 pieces of my birthday cake, and enjoy my family. Oh and I can't forget, I have 52 candles to blow out!
That being said, I do have my days when I feel as if I am carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders. Usually, though, I feel confident in who I am and my place in this world.
I have simple dreams, nothing extraordinary, to other peoples standards, and that is OK to me, I'm not trying to live anyone else's idea of what life should be. I have never had worldly aspirations of fame or fortune, or ever had a true case of wanderlust.
My dreams were to find a good man that I love with all of my heart, a man who loves me back the same way, and thankfully, I have been very blessed with just that kind of man! I knew I wanted children, and Voila, I have a son and a daughter, as well as 2 beautiful grandchildren, the loves of my life! My health is on track, even after a few bumps in the road of life, but, I am back from my detour, traveling down a straightforward highway.
My grandmother always used to say "On your birthday, reflect on your past year. What would you change, if you could, what made you the happiest? What do you want to accomplish between today and your next birthday? What are you willing to sacrifice to achieve it"? Pretty profound questions, if you really think about it. As a child, I was always flippant with my answers, as a young adult, I was unrealistic in my answers.
Today, I have thought a lot about my choices this past year. What would I change? I'm not sure I would have changed anything, what has made me the happiest? Without a doubt, my grandchildren! They bring out the big kid in me and keep me laughing and feeling young. Exhausted? Obviously, but happy! My friends as well, laughing, and getting together playing a rousing game of Wizard, with Shelley and her husband Kerry, and once this year, I actually beat Kerry, which was a definite highlight! Talking and laughing with Char for hours, until our bellies hurt. Playing Euchre and Chrocinole with Rick and Deb, positive that the men cheated! So many fun times this past year. The times, I am truly thankful for.
What do I want to accomplish this next year? I don't know, I need some time to consider it. I would like to say end hunger in my community, but I know that won't happen in 1 year, and it would require more than me to accomplish it. If I could, I would sacrifice my me time, which isn't much, so when I get it, I appreciate it. However, I would gladly give it up to erase the pain and stigma of hunger.
So, today, I have reflected on my past years experiences, good and bad, planned for my next year, and prayed for its fruition.
Now, I am left with 364 days, and 17 hours until my next birthday, so I am free to hear my family sing me Happy Birthday, make a wish, eat a piece, or maybe even 2 pieces of my birthday cake, and enjoy my family. Oh and I can't forget, I have 52 candles to blow out!
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